Stop Relying on Others for Your Confidence

Let’s be honest for a moment. How often do your mood and confidence hinge on the number of likes you get on Facebook, Twitter, or any other platform with social currency? Unfortunately, many of us exchange social currency for confidence. It might seem like a good trade, right? I’ll like your dog pictures on Facebook, and you like my new profile picture with sunglasses while I’m looking away from the camera.

But there’s a downside to this exchange. It’s FAKE. And you know it!

People on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter don’t care about your diploma, promotion, dog, or kids. They press like so you’ll return the favor. I call this crowdsourcing confidence, and social media is a self-sufficient business built on trading likes.

But there’s another side to crowdsourcing confidence. What happens when no one likes the things we share? Yes, we feel terrible.

Why is that? Are we that shallow?

It’s not just social media where this happens. Most people seek confidence through compliments from their spouse, boss, friends, or colleagues. Which is why we feel better when someone says, “Good job.” It’s validation, and we depend on it.

For years, people can chase validation without even realizing it; it just creeps into the system…